Good Times
by deathgrowsmyjasmine
Summary: These were the good times, the times in which they were on the same level, synchronized, who knew for how long.


**A short little thing and a bit angsty I suppose. Blah don't own anything (shame, really!), reviews are super welcome and appreciated (as in SQUEEEEE REVIEW!), critique is just as wanted! I am no native speaker, so mistakes are certainly in here. I apologize if this is a bit messy, I was unsure about publishing it altogether, but oh well, I thought I'd let you judge. :) Enjoy!**

The lamp on the bedside table was the only source of light in the room. It revealed the bodies of two people in the double bed: A woman, her face hidden by hair falling over it, curled up under her blanket, sleeping; a man next to her, sitting up, reading a book in the low light. The paper rustled when he turned a page, and she let out a little sigh in her sleep, but didn't wake up. With a smile he tucked her unbelievable curls behind her ear, but they fell back over her face in a heartbeat, and his smile got even wider: It seemed that not even her hair let others decide what to do. He played with one especially rebellious streak, very careful to not wake her up, but he just couldn't resist.

These were the good times, the times in which they were on the same level, synchronized, who knew for how long.

Lost in thought he watched her chest rise and fall with every breath. He reached out for the table and put his book to the side. It was always strange to him to watch her sleeping. Whatever she did, she was always all over the place, the centre of attention, running, laughing, flirting. To see her still was just... odd, but also soothing.

When they first met, well, when he first met her, he hadn't been the man he was yet. Of course that was only half of the truth: He was always the same; but she had changed him just as much as his body has changed.

From the day she died on their relationship had been a rush for him, way too complicated and confusing for them to be called a normal couple. He preferred the term "lovers", because whenever they met, no matter in which point of their messy time streams – there was always love. In the best and rarest case it was mutual, although he sometimes suspected it had always been that way... meeting someone who knows everything about you makes it hard to control your feelings.

Yes, these were the good times.

The look on her face after their – his – first kiss would always be burned in his memory; an expression of pain and loss that, one day, he will wear. How he wished he could turn back time (what a ridiculous thing to think for a time traveller!) and not ruining the moment like he did back then. But in his eleventh regeneration he was a bit, well, _awkward_ about the whole love thing. It had been ridiculous really, he had done all of this before, hugging, kissing, and even... other stuff, but it took him a while to get used to it again. Now that he was, he tried to make it up to her, although he knows it will never be enough. He doesn't know how long they will have, and she can't tell him. Maybe it was for the better...maybe they had years.

He had come a long way with his feelings. But you couldn't really blame him for that, could you? Suddenly that woman was there, a woman he would trust completely one day, and she died in front of his eyes. Her knowledge had scared him a bit, he, the man "who could turn an army around by the mention of his name", was so lost; she enjoyed every second of turning his head, and there was nothing, absolutely nothing he could do about it. However, to be perfectly honest, he didn't try too hard. And well, after endless banter, the one or the other kiss and Berlin, when she gave up lifetimes for him, he had had to admit that he didn't want her to leave anymore, that he liked having her around, that maybe he was in love.

And then came the day he had to die, the day he would be killed by his lover, and the day this incredible, unbelievable woman would decide that time is not her boss. And turned the world upside down. Again, he hurt her on this day, because he just could not believe he deserved this; the love of this woman, who told her she would suffer more than everything living in the universe, just for him. It had hurt him to see her trying to save him, as he was convinced nobody would care... but she healed him, making him believe that he deserves to be loved. He didn't have to marry her, he knew that – but he wanted to show it to the universe: She had saved him.

He was afraid of the future. Soon the love in her eyes would slowly fade away, and he was not sure whether he would be able to handle it. Handle the fact that she would fall out of love with him a bit more every time they met.

With a sigh the Doctor switched off the lights and put his arms around River. These were the good times.


End file.
